A Decade of Tears

Sometimes the sadness is so overwhelming, the need to put it on paper and look at it, gives the pain a chance to ebb.   Sometimes that works...not always...
So as I look at this mile mark, I come to the full realization that I am not stuck in the past- but the past has left such an indelible mark that it is necessary to purge the grief and let the tears flow.   It is part of living fully: not denying that the loss is forever engraved on my heart, but recognizing that it as much a part of me as breathing.  and that is ok.

A Decade of Tears         

Sept 6, 2014

For some reason I thought the tears would stop falling  

For some reason I thought my mind would stop calling for you.

For some reason I thought I would stop counting days

for some reason I thought I would move through the haze.

But a decade of tears have gathered

There’s a river of sadness and grief

And its growing and flowing becoming an ocean

A Decade of tears at my feet.

For some reason I thought life would continue

For some reason I thought that I’d let you go

For some reason I thought that the hurt would be less

For some reason I thought I’d get over this mess…but no

For a decade of tears have gathered

There’s a river of sadness and grief

And its growing and flowing becoming an ocean

A decade of tears at my feet.

For some reason people think that I’m fierce and I’m strong

For some reason people think that I’m moving forward along

For some reason I’ve managed to  fool all the world except me

For some reason I just can’t let old memories be

So a decade of tears have gathered

There’s a river of sadness and grief

And its growing and flowing becoming an ocean

A decade of tears at my feet.